An Easter egg hunt should be fun, not uncivil

Dear Thelma: Have you ever been to one of those big community Easter egg hunts? I took my 4-year-old and 2-year-old to one last year and I was appalled. No one thought to instruct the children – or the adults, for that matter – on how to behave.

There was pushing and shoving and hoarding of eggs. It was not enjoyable and I won’t go back, but maybe you could write about it so people can improve their behavior for this year.

A: I have attended such a hunt, and I’m aware that with a large crowd difficulties can arise. The most important thing for people to remember is to be considerate.

Before the hunt, parents should talk with their children about how to behave. Let them know that there should be no pushing or shoving to get to the eggs. Tell them that if they see that someone is bending down to pick up a particular egg, that egg is now that person’s and shouldn’t be swiped from them as they’re reaching for it. Also, talk beforehand about an appropriate number of eggs to collect. Depending on the hunt and the crowd, that may be five per kid or a whole basket full. This shouldn’t be an exercise of who can scoop up the most eggs. It’s about having fun with a group and sharing what has been shared with you.

Adults should supervise the children they’ve brought to the hunt and they should be depended upon to follow the rules and make sure their own kids do. These large community hunts usually are divided into age categories and may have rules on how many eggs should be collected by each child. Parents are expected to make sure the rules are followed.

Finally, teach children the manners of being grateful for the things provided to them. Have your child personally thank an organizer of the hunt for planning the hunt and providing the fun and prizes.

Dear Thelma: I know you’ve written about the importance of family traditions in the past. I wanted to share with you one of our family’s and how we’re expanding it this year. I have four kids. Easter is a big celebration in our home and dyeing Easter eggs is a big event. My kids have talked about it to their friends and now all the neighborhood kids want to come over to dye eggs. We’re excited to have found a fun and loving way to share our Easter tradition with those around us.

A: Easter egg dyeing in a family is a great connector that draws you closer through the sharing of the tradition. The fact that your kids enjoy it and want others to share in it is wonderful. Your willingness to share is wonderful too.

I’d suggest you make it an event that your kids can play roles in. Decide together when you will do it and those you will invite. You might want to ask each person to come with their eggs pre-boiled. Have the children put together an invitation with instructions and get it out to friends. Use the event as a way to teach your kids about party planning and being good hosts. At the event, assign big kids to help the younger ones who attend.

I’d love to know if you’ll have a big neighborhood hunt with all the eggs or send everyone home with eggs for their own hunts. Either way it’s a fun activity that will build closeness among you and your children and build community within your neighborhood.

Sharing traditions and good manners never go out of style.

Agree or disagree with Thelma’s advice? Post your comments or ask a question about etiquette at thelmadomenici.com. Thelma Domenici is CEO of Thelma Domenici & Associates, offering corporate coaching and contemporary social skills development programs to all ages.