May the Best Contraption Win: Mechanical Fighters Face Off
By Damian Garde, senior, Los Lunas High School
For the Journal
Members say the first rule of Robot Fight Club is: Do not talk about Robot Fight Club. The second rule— well, you can see where this is going. Robot Fight Club is sweeping the underground (that would be the APS Career Enrichment Center), as students pit their specially designed Remote Operated Vehicles (ROVs) head-to-head as part of Ray Tokuda's advanced placement physics class.
The objective of each bout is to tear the head— in this case, a ping-pong ball— off the opposing robot as many times as possible before time is called. Students use remote controls to maneuver the rotating arms and lifting mechanisms of creations with names like Communist Fuzzy LovBot, Iron Fist and the dreaded Ringo Tally-Hassle.
On this day, the first in the ring are heated rivals Ringo Tally-Hassle and Justice Monkey Superstar. Frenzy is in the air as the two 'bots make their way toward each other. But in seconds, fortune has turned on Justice Monkey Superstar. Not only is it decapitated three times, it actually catches fire, assuring victory for Ringo Tally-Hassle.
Next, Holy Grail, piloted by Aaron Zimmerman, takes on the curiously titled What? in an evenly matched battle. The two charge each other, but due to mechanical failure, the round is called a draw, pressing them into the tiebreaker. In a tiebreaker round, robots must compete to be first to retrieve a ping-pong ball placed in the center of the ring.
The round begins and the deft Holy Grail makes its way to the ring's center, easily securing the ball in its bracket.
Covered in Bolshevik red carpeting, the aptly titled Communist Fuzzy LovBot battles the black-clad Iron Fist.
The robots converge on each other in what proves to be a match of give and take. Throughout, they slam into one another, furiously swinging their appendages toward the other's head. Finally, in a feverish clash, Communist Fuzzy LovBot decapitates its aggressor, making the only point scored in the bout.
As time runs out, Communist Fuzzy LovBot emerges victorious.
After skillfully defeating What?, Holy Grail returns to the ring to take on Seth Myers and his 'bot, Ringo Tally-Hassle. The two fighters immediately entangle in fury. In an all-out nail-biter, each robot scores three decapitations apiece within the time allotted, forcing them into the tiebreaker.
As the tiebreaker begins, the bots struggle for the center. However, Holy Grail is disqualified as the result of a logistical technicality, and Ringo Tally-Hassle is declared the winner.
Finally, the two winning robots, Communist Fuzzy LovBot and Ringo Tally-Hassle are summoned to the ring once more for the battle that will determine the tournament champ (and recipient of a ridiculous amount of extra credit).
After ascending from the losers' bracket, Communist Fuzzy LovBot must win only once to take the tournament, while Ringo Tally-Hassle must score two victories. Poised to annihilate, the two 'bots pursue conquest. The cheers and jeers of spectators echo through the arena— rather, classroom— as splintered wood and shredded shag carpeting adorn the ring.
At the end of the 3-minute round, the two robots remain tied, calling for yet another tiebreaker. The two competitors make their way to the ball, and it is mysteriously ejected from the table, leaving witnesses quarreling over who, exactly, struck it first.
Thanks to an on-hand cameraman, the winner can be determined by frame-by-frame replay. The video reveals Ringo Tally-Hassle to be the victor, resulting in another round of robotic clashes.
Round 2 proves to be just as close as round one, with each 'bot colliding with the other in a hail of cries from the nervous audience. Finally, with no decapitations as yet, and less than a minute remaining in the round, Ringo Tally-Hassle is pushed into its opponent's base, and therefore disqualified.
Proud and overwhelmed with the glory of victory, Communist Fuzzy LovBot is declared champion.
Pilot Stephen Babineau humbly credits his good luck, adding, "Communism: Bringing about utopia in an inefficient way."
Occupying the gray area between physics and amateur boxing, Robot Fight Club is an engrossing, albeit nerdy, sport. Despite its advanced robotic engineering, and because of its opportunity for violent release, look for Robot Fight Club to catch on nationwide.
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