Journal North: Home | Sports | Opinion | Obits | Entertainment
Monday, July 21, 2008
Those New Mexicans Really Love Their Sports
By Arnold Vigil
For the Journal
Just about a handful of months ago I went to a friend's house for some type of celebration or another, and as usual I ended up in front of the television with my kids watching a football game.
Of course, the kids really weren't watching the game before that time — they were too busy turning into jelly brains with their PlayStation controllers in hand and not a clue about what was going on around them. Then I walked in the room, pulled rank like the bully I am, and made them change the channel so that I could take my turn at being a zombie in front of the television — and become just as oblivious to the "mature" chitchat reverberating around me in the process. (Gee, and I often wonder where those couch-potato kids get those jelly-brained habits.)
That abrupt channel change must have broken the party ice because, before you know it, some more mature stragglers came in to watch the Eagles whale on the Cowboys, one of the favorite teams of my friend's daughter-in-law, who also wandered in.
That's right, this young newlywed sat down and starting batting out statistics, players' names, team names and just about anything else that is basically learned when you watch ESPN, FOX Sports or CNN on TV every night — except one thing, she didn't have cable or the Lifetime Channel back at her home in Texas, although I don't think she'd be into that girlie channel anyway.
Rather, she gleaned her knowledge of professional sports the old-fashioned way — from a lifelong love of organized athletics, the newspaper and gathering around the water cooler. Oh yeah, and she and her new husband were doing pretty well playing fantasy football on the Internet where she picked up her superior knowledge of that current football season's statistical details.
After I finally admitted that my favorite team was the bottom-dwelling Oakland Raiders she looked startled that I even had a team. Then she revealed that her new husband, my friend's son, didn't really follow sports when she met him. She said that he matter-of-factly told her that people from New Mexico weren't into sports at all, probably to cover for her zealous interest in professional sports and his lack thereof.
I guess she really believed him because she genuinely looked surprised when she learned many of us New Mexicans do, indeed, follow professional sports, including my kids who I have painstakingly brainwashed since they were infants into liking my favorite teams.
Now knowing my friend's son since he was a wee book-reading lad himself — $#!@-eating grin and all — I knew he was pulling her leg about this general disinterest in sports and all. So I decided to have a little fun as well.
"Yes," I told her, "we do love sports here in New Mexico. In fact there are whole communities that get behind certain teams."
"Really," she replied, ready to fall hook, line and sinker. "What do you mean?"
"Well, down south we have this community called Hatch and they call themselves that 'Chile Capital of the World," I said. "And do you know what team this community of chile growers root for?"
"No," she said. "Which one?"
"Why the Miami Heat, of course, because they like it nice and hot down there. And their second-favorite team is the Phoenix Suns."
"Really," she replied. "Are there any others?"
"Sure, down at Truth or Consequences and Elephant Butte they really like the Los Angeles Lakers," I told her in my best poker face. "And if the Lakers are sinking that year, then they'll pull for the New York Islanders or the Florida Marlins or the Seattle Mariners.
"And they really don't care for the Carolina Hurricanes or the San Jose Sharks or the Pittsburgh Pirates."
"Wow" she said. "And all this time I thought you guys didn't like sports."
"Yeah, we sure do," I said, my mind racing at 100 mph trying think up some more teams to keep this taffy pulling. "In fact, up north there are some people in some small isolated communities who still believe in brujos and brujas and La Llorona and the paranormal and all.
"These norteņos are also very religious, so they always pray for the New Orleans Saints to win on Sundays as well as the San Diego Padres. But, on the other hand, they're also very afraid of the Orlando Magic, the New Jersey Devils and the Washington Wizards."
"Man, he never told me any of this," she said of her husband. "This is too much."
"Of course, down at the state penitentiary they really like one particular team — the Pittsburgh Steelers," I said with conviction. "But that's only because they think they're stealers, you know, like looters. But, you know, some of the other inmates they keep in protective custody like the Nashville Predators."
"But what about the Texas teams?" she asked. "Doesn't anyone around here like any Texas teams?"
"Oh sure," I answered. "But that kind of gets complicated, you know, like a mysterious beautiful woman who loves the Cleveland Cavaliers but will never allow herself to be tamed by one man.
"There are many Native Americans here who are quite passionate about the Cowboys, believe it or not. On the other hand, I don't know if it would be PC to bring up the subject of the Atlanta Braves, the Cincinnati Reds, the Golden State Warriors or the Washington Redskins around them.
"And the Cleveland Indians, I won't even go there. But I will mention that there are a bunch of crazy Chicanos up north who love the Cleveland Browns first, and then the Minnesota Wild and the Atlanta Thrashers."
"So what you're saying is that whole communities in New Mexico will get behind the one team that they can identify with?" she asked.
"Well not necessarily," I answered. "Sometimes there are little pockets of people who like to be different than the whole.
"For instance, the folks down at The Cuttery like the Los Angeles Clippers, and the fire department dudes like the Calgary Flames.
"But on the other hand, groundskeepers at the state Capitol detest the Toronto Maple Leafs, and those inside on the fourth floor could do without the Ottawa Senators. And there's a whole bunch of guys at the spa who really get behind the Green Bay Packers."
By that time, the game on TV had ended, so I told her that in the days before organized city-league sports and television here in Santa Fe, they used to make the kids box for entertainment. But now, the only time that happens is when the little tykes are arguing over who gets the good PlayStation controller.
And if there are no boxing gloves around, then we have to resort to some great ol' professional leg pulling, you know, Chicago Bull style.