Saturday, June 13, 2009

Advice for the Tough Times: Just Keep Swimming

By Jennifer Huard
For the Journal
          My father always told me, "Listen to your elders. They may not have as much education as you have, but they are older than you and have experienced more in life and therefore are wiser than you are."
        He also told me I would never be as close to anyone as I would be to my brother and sister. That no matter if I grew up and got married, the fact that the three of us shared many of the same experiences together under the same roof for so many years and were there for each other most of the time makes that a unique and special bond no one can compete with.
        At the time — my teenage years, as I recall — I thought I understood what he meant, but of course I didn't entirely.
        I didn't understand how important it was to spend as much time as possible with my grandparents, because I would surely miss them when they would be taken far too soon.
        I didn't understand the heartbreak of losing a parent and the instant maturity that comes with it. I didn't understand the humbling experience of losing a job or the confidence gained upon landing a new and better one after rounds of fruitless interviews and relentless searching.
        My best friend of 35 years offered up her words of wisdom recently in a care package she sent, along with tokens of love and encouragement to lift my spirits and get me through a rough time. She included some trinkets, the book "Swimming to Antarctica," some microwave popcorn and a packet of green Kool-Aid, just like the kind we used to make on our sleepovers in seventh grade. All meaningful items she knew would brighten my day and give me the encouragement I needed. Inscribed inside the book were the words, "Jenny, just keep swimming."
        Advice is everywhere, and I feel the more we can share with each other to make the journey a little easier to understand, the better. So when I came across Regina Brett's 45 Life Lessons, it was something I just had to pass along, to maybe help ease someone else's load today. Given space restrictions, I offer 20 of her life lessons here. Visit my blog for the full list.
        1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
        2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
        3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
        4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
        5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
        6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
        7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
        8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
        9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
        10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
        11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
        12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
        13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
        14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
        15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
        16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
        17. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
        18. Frame every so-called disaster with these words, 'In five years, will this matter?'
        19. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
        20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
        I would have to agree with every one.
        Quote of the Week: "So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit — It's when things seem worst that you must not quit." — "Don't Quit," author unknown
        Jennifer Huard's column appears each Saturday. She welcomes your e-mails at jhuard@abqjournal.com. Visit her blog at www.jenniferhuard.blogspot.com.
       

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