Pet care: Cat won't take a lap and it's the pits

Q: I have two cats, 2 years old, that I got at a shelter 1½ years ago. They had at least one feral parent and they are fine except they are almost impossible to be lap cats. I have one trained to sit on my lap but she is very skittish and finicky. The other one won’t sit on a lap unless she kneads my female partner’s underarm. It can get quite irritating.

Dr. Nichol: Your kittens might have been cuddle bugs, but who they turned out to be was the product of multiple factors. The sensitive period for their socialization with people, dogs and other cats was 2 to 9 weeks of age. It was during this window of time that their immature brains formed early memories and neural connections that became indelible parts of their personalities. It’s a safe bet that they missed out on exposure to nice folks like you.

Genetics is another driver of snuggliness. Research has shown that some cat brains come hard-wired for lifelong fearful behavior. Sit quietly with tasty treats next to you on the couch — before feeding. Allow your nervous nellies to approach when they are ready. Set them up for success by providing a plethora of quasi-natural feline activities.

The inside of your house can be a wonderland of opportunities to hunt, stalk and maim “prey.” Cats need to climb and perch high above it all. Add hide boxes at various heights in different rooms so your kitties can get small and invisible. Find a full list of feline environmental enrichments on my website, drjeffnichol.com. A safe and tasty antianxiety supplement, Zylkene or Anxitane, can help diminish the heebie jeebies. Both are available online.

I encourage adoption planning. Before falling for the first pretty kitty, prospective cat parents should review my article and video on “Choosing the Greatest Kitten for Your Life,” also on my website.

Finally, human armpits have their own ecosystem: insects and bacteria are known to thrive there. Thanks to your partner, we now know that cats can as well. That’s a commitment.

For help with behavior problems, you can sign up for a Zoom group conference at drjeffnichol.com

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